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Middle Earth Alphabet
-A- is for Aragorn:
He's cunning and wise.
You know, soon he'll be king,
And he'll rule all you guys.
-B- is for Boromir:
A man strong and cool,
Yet sadly he's corrupted
And then he dies, so pitiful.
-C- is for cookies:
Lembas type food.
The elven cooks make it,
And boy, is it good!
-D- is for doom:
Death, destruction too.
And hear me dear Fellowship,
These three are for you.
-E- is for Elrond:
Cranky and smart.
And with all the elves,
He wants Arwen to depart.
-F- is for Frodo:
The lead hobbit
Sam's his protector
Without Sam, he'd have quit.
-G- is for Gimli:
A stolid old dwarf
He's a tank but he's small
And not blue like a smurf.
-H- is Haldir:
An elfy type man
Who likes to shoot arrows
As fast as he can.
-I- is for immortal:
Wizards and elves
Gandalf is one of those
Who put death on the shelves.
-J- is for journey:
A long one to make
The Fellowship must travel
A nasty road they must take.
-K- is for Khazad Dum:
That dark little hole
Where Gandalf fell with a Balrog
Who looks like flaming coal.
-L- is for Legolas:
The pretty boy here
He's just some prancing acher
That has a pointy left ear.
-M- is for Merry:
A hobbit he is
But Pippin's babysitter
Is really what he seems.
-N- is for nine:
A popular number
With nine evil baddies in black
And the fellowship's herd
-O- is for orcs:
Those nasty old things
That Saruman cross-bred
To create the icky Uruk beings.
-P- is for Pippin:
The moron himself
He's a cute little bugger
But not pretty like an elf.
-Q- is for Quickbeam:
A big hasty ent
Who kicks some Goblin butt
When to Isengard he went.
-R- is for Radagast:
Not in the flick.
But to help Gandalf in the book,
He is the one to pick!
-S- is for Sauron:
Da big floaty eye
He forged that stupid ring
Looking for evil? He's your guy.
-T- is for Tom Bombadil:
A merry old fellow
Who wears a blue jacket
And Boots that are yellow.
-U- is for Undomiel:
Arwen's last name.
She's a purty elf-girl
To her, Aragorn's fair game.
-V- is for Vilya:
That's Elrond's ring.
The ring of air,
A pretty blue thing.
-W- is for Wildmen:
Psycho redneck killers.
To them, killing Theoden
Would be quite a thriller.
-X- is for xilophone:
To play when it's sunny.
I couldn't think of much else,
And I thought this'd be funny.
-Y- is for Yodeling:
Not what elves do.
If you say they can't sing,
Elves'll come after you!
-Z- is for Zowee!
And the fact that they make it.
The good guys all win,
Without their security blanket.